Abandonment is a brush with death, perhaps not a death of the body but a death of the spirit within us.
A child who is abandoned by his parents dies a painful death of the spirit. There is a scene in a movie about the race horse “Seabiscuit” in which a young boy, Red Pollard, is sold by his parents during the Great Depression. They need the money to feed their younger children. The scene is emotionally devastating.
Children and spouses of a parent who commits suicide die a little bit when they learn of the death of a mother or father. I have a classmate who was rushed home right before Christmas. We were told that his mother was ill. I learned many years later that she had committed suicide. I will never forget the day he told me, many, many years later about the truth of that day.
Today’s Gospel tells us of the apostles struggling with the news that Jesus is going away. After his death, they lock themselves in a room and wonder how this could have happened. Jesus had promised them that they would not be left orphans. However, that’s exactly what they felt like.
Jesus tried to prepare his followers for the days to come. He told them that the Holy Spirit, the spirit of truth, would tell them everything that the Father had shared with him. Though it was he who was nailed to the cross on Calvary and they who had run away, their souls died a little on that fateful Friday.
However, “In a little while,” something stirred within them. God’s presence filled them in a new way. Fear gave way to assurance and strength. Jesus’ puzzling words became real: “I am in you and you are in me.” Aroused by the Spirit, they returned to life and their new journey began.
The Church pairs this section of the Gospel of St. John with the Acts of the Apostles expressly to show us what it was like to return to life after the apostles had experienced a time of abandonment. They show us how to live in the Spirit, the Spirit of life and truth.
Fr. Lawrence Jagdfeld, O.F.M.